alone

AND THEN THERE WAS LIGHT!

Up in the hills there was this sudden change in light and then there was silence all around. The birds were chirping but their chirping was part of the silence and there was no movement.

A reservoir in the valley had turned to molten gold. The landscape changed colour from orange to gold and then to bright gold. There was a mist suffusing everything in a golden glow...

And then the sun came out of the clouds and the magic was gone.


*****

neha

my grandchild neha is two years and four months old. she is staying with us for a few days with her mother.

a few months ago, when she was with us last, i could draw her attention in the direction i wanted by introducing something surprising into the scheme of things, like the discovery of a long procession of ants across the room. she would forget her demand to go watching the temple elephant in the sun and would be fully involved in the excitement of the new discovery.

but now i find she cannot be distracted from what she wants. if she says "take me to the elephant, appooppa," she means just that. i cannot distract her by showing her ants or butterflies.

she is developing a will of her own!

*****

golf

yesterday i went into the heart of a golfer,
walking alone in the night
over a golf course we have in the city.

i have never played the game in my life
and have often wondered
what it is the fun in this game,
hitting a ball with a club
till the ball falls into a hole!

and so i walked
over this golf course,
alone,
starlit,
yesterday night.

a million sparkling stars twinkled in the skies
and there were trees, etched in black artistry,
silhouetted against the subdued glow of the horizon,
the grass undulating over the course
and the sandy bunkers,
the cushioned squeak of my feet,
over the wet grass,
a vague unidentifiable fragrance in the breeze,
the hooting of an owl...

and i thought:
if i hit the ball from where i stand,
i will have to factor in the distant
hooting of the owl,
the wind and its fragrance,
the bunkers,
the inky blotches of oblivion, dancing still,
in the trees,
my stance and backlift and follow-through
as i swing the club in an arc,
the steel of the club,
the temper and bounce of the ball,
the laws of gravity,
the roll of the gentle slope of the neatly mowed grass,
the wetness of dew on each leaf of grass,
and thence the narrow path to the hole...

and i understood why some people are crazy about golf.

*****

eagle

can you imagine a condition
free from all conflicts?
you don't have to rush to be in time for any train...
no train waits for you at the station. no one is waiting anywhere to discuss with you business; you have nothing engaging your mind...you are empty of  thoughts.

then you feel like an eagle.
the lightness of the eagle floods into your heart,
filling the whole of your being and you feel weightless as you float up
and circle high in the sky...
naked, defenceless, in the full glare of the sun, never knowing a bother about being so vulnerable, yet not knowing a bother about the word vulnerable either...

you float unseen,
high in the sky, like the eagle, its eyes
picking up each movement on the ground.

*****

divisible, indivisible

i live in time and space and yet am not of time and space...

*****

one of the things

one of the things so funny in us
in this present-day world of indecision--
not knowing what, where--
is our propensity to shut ourselves out
and listen only to the roar from the gallery.

they tell me my father has committed treason;
so i slay him
and i exult in them exulting in the hero in me.

*****