Sunday, 23 February 2014


Taking my cue from something in my previous post, it seems to me 'belonging' is a word of deep and intimate meanings.

We are all individual souls at the very core. When we diffuse ourselves within the family, there is belonging happening. The circle grows larger when that diffusing process pours us into a team, a community etc...

In all these successive steps the individual becomes thinner and thinner. Within the family, your interest is the interest of the family. Within the team, your interest is the interest of the team and so on and so forth...

When you stand separate in the family, the belonging does not happen. When you stand separate in the team, the belonging and the teamwork expected of the team does not happen. And you become an anti-social being when you stand separate, in some lofty tower, from society at large, concerned only about your comfort, your glory, immersed totally in the special entity you believe you are...

Quite interesting when we start looking at the process like this, isn't it?



Anonymous said...

Not sure that I agree with that entirely! Will share my 2 cents worth as soon as I organize my thought!!! Stand by!!! :D

Anon Friend :)

Anonymous said...

Organized thoughts.....

While we are at the core, individual souls, we're also social beings. That is to say, we do need to interact with others. This satisfies our need to belong. However, this 'diffusion' doesn't necessarily have to lead to 'thinning'(I presume you are referring to the gradual loss of identity here). I don't believe one has to sacrifice one's core self in one's quest to belong. That a lot of people do allow it to happen is rather tragic but I don't believe that it's inevitable.

By the same token, standing apart doesn't necessarily mean that one doesn't belong! One still belongs but chooses not to be in the thick of things. It doesn't make one, unsocial!

To me, it's all about walking that fine line between belonging to a group while still staying true to one's identity!

Easier said than done, but certainly achievable!

P. Venugopal said...

Walking that fine line is the challenge, as you say.
A friend of mine here had put it to me another way sometime back. He speaks about being able to proceed along two parallel lines. Keeping your individual identity while being fully conscious about your "universal" identity. A drop within an ocean. Then you can see an ocean in drop of water, he said (and that is a tall order!)

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

Despite being an individual, the human (as most living things are) is essential a social being.

The finest example of the individuality is Ayn Rand's "Fountain Head" which incidently is still my fav book.
However, I realised that the book can only remain an act of fictional writing. It can never be practical. I feel in this life, in addition to our individual achievement, we need the warmth and encouragement that our family provides us with.

However, you can give up our life for your family, but not your soul.

Also, we are constantly evolving. So, what we consider a person's "individuality" at one point in their life may be meaningless or even harmful at another point.

Anonymous said...

".....seeing the ocean in a drop of water." Absolutely love the imagery of that statement ....very, very evocative!!!

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

Venu mash,

Your friend's philosophy seems to resonate with some of the vakyas on the Vedas ... Like how we are a manifestation of the Supreme .. Similarly the water drop is a manifestation of the ocean ..

My friend used to tell me that all people in this world face the same problems, go through the same situations.. What make them stand out is their reaction to these situations. So, in effect, everyone is highly individualistic but since they respond in similar patterns to an external stimuli, the individuality is hidden.

P. Venugopal said...

In my early twenties, I too was flammoxed by the character of Howard Roark in the Fountain Head. I will have to write several pages to say what an influence the book had been on my character evolution in early youth. I tried reading the book again recently, but was somehow unimpressed... As you say, as life evolves over time, perspectives are not today the same person you were yesterday, are you? We can never fit any person into a pattern, limit him or her to a description, a word... When we do that, we miss out on reading people. As you say we are constantly evolving. And if we don't cling overmuch on sentiment, nostalgia etc...our evolution will be faster...we start learning faster.

'Ocean in a drop' expression is an expression, I think, one can think and think and think without ever getting its full meaning.

Sorcerer said...

Quiet interesting...hmmm

Individuality is a powerful entity that can blend with a team.
The flip side is
Individuality is a powerful entity that can blend a team to it. It all depends on how powerful an individual we are.

I believe that individuality is not lost at any point but graded into the hues of an average when it comes to a social framework.Your individuality is what gives you a class in a society.A stronger class governs the rest of the society. A stronger individual governs the class.

Feeling of belonging doesn't mean letting go of your identity to be in a social class, but rather gaining/having a respect for your identity and emotions in a social class by being what one is. By giving up on our identity, true gratification can never be achieved and hence the "belonging" can never be sustained.
(Sometimes, conscious can act like a maha bitch!!! or worse than a nagging kid.)

Only when a certain level of true gratification is achieved on part of an individual, can one feel truly belonged.

Soul is nothing but a collective knowledge of all your learning. Soul is not an individual but a layer way above the individual. Soul guides the individual with its learning and instincts. (Language of the soul is so diverse). It is up to the individual to rely upon the soul to make itself powerful or weak.

Aaah..the vicious circle of life!!!

P. Venugopal said...

it seems to me you have touched the key when you said "only when a certain level of true gratification is achieved on part of an individual, can one feel truly belonged"...
i have seen homes where the young treat the aged as though they don't belong, their role is over, they are in the way. we are so busy with our struggle to be winners, make money etc. that the old ones are a burden, bogging us down...