Saturday, 19 December 2009

Why I blog

This is a slightly polished version of a comment I posted today in reply to another comment against one my pieces. I am putting it as a separate post since it is about why I blog.
I started this blog in August 2008 when I was in a kind of trauma (with a badly shaken ego), the details of which are irrelevant now.
Round about the same time I started going deeply into Krishnamurti and Osho and I started seeing what was wrong.
I started noticing that when I have an agenda or a desire all creativity in me is dead. The mind moves in two directions, either to the past or to the future, either weighed down or elated by what had happened in the past, or worried or spinning grand schemes of the future.
This process, whichever way the movement of the mind, bogs one down. One is not light and free to respond to the moment, neither in the profession, nor in personal life. It is very difficult to make the mind still. Only when the mind is still, I started noticing, can there be creativity.
This blog I started with the intention of watching this watching process in me, although there are other trivial things also in it. It is something for myself, and my friends on the blog are helping me along.
Thank you.

*****

6 comments:

I Me Myself said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Balachandran V said...

Pardon me,but I feel you still have an agenda; an agenda of watching yourself, an agenda of writing poetry, an agenda to be creative, to impress, to still your mind. The way I see it, even this level of self-consciousness has to be shed. I do not think mind has to be made still to be creative. It comes, anytime, uninvited. And when it comes, mind is full of it, until you are purged..Just leave the doors open and forget, even the doors...

Balachandran V said...

And if I may say so, forget JK and Osho and Basho. Think of them as gentle breezes that waft in and pass through, once in a while.

vijay said...

No winner no loser in this game of life.
No Satan no Saint.
Satan turns into Saint
Saint turns into Satan .
Every moment...
We are all fluid.
We are all fools.

P. Venugopal said...

ho, ho, ho, vijay! what a relief for the truth in black and white!!
balan, you have been a support in this watching process. we have shared what is happening. there is the possibility of being free and we have to fool our way to it, if at all it is possible.
"what boon do you seek," asked Godden Kali, or whoever it was.
"no boon as such," said Naranathu Bhrandan.
"but that is not fair," She protested. "you bring me all the way here and now say you don't want any boon? you have elephantiasis on your left feet. what about making it vanish?"
Naranathu Bhrandan thinks for a second and says:
"hello, Kali Ma, now that you mention it, what about putting it in my right foot? it will be nice to know how it feels like, this change."
we are doing thing all the time.

kochuthresiamma p .j said...

interesting post AND comments. yes blogging does have a cathartic effect.